One More Shot

     I was made aware of this project and felt that I needed to share it. An infertile couple made a documentary out of their infertility struggle and the 2 minute preview had me crying like, well, a baby.

     There is also an 8-minute preview, which I haven't viewed yet. Honestly, the footage I have seen is so raw and so true and I give them so much credit for having the guts to do this, and the desire to lend a voice to infertility.

Check out the trailer and donate so they can finish this puppy and unleash it on the world for fertiles and not-so-fertiles alike!

http://www.onemoreshotfilm.com/#trailer

The Game Plan

     My last Depot Lupron injection was May 1st - the last in a series of 3. You can read more about my premature foray into menopause here. While I have been on Lupron injections, I have been working with Dr. Kwak-Kim, a Reproductive Immunologist based out of Chicago, to formulate an immune protocol for my FET. My RE has been out of the country visiting family, and he is now back in action, and together we also came up with a plan. The marriage of this entire preparation is overwhelming.

Here's what we got so far:

5/1 last Depot Lupron injection

5/3 begin Prednisone as part of immune protocol to decrease cytokine level

5/17 blood work for Dr. KK - CBC, metabolic panel, TSH, NK cells and Cytokines (NK and cytokines have to be drawn and then mailed to Dr. KKs lab - a local hospital is willing to do this "courtesy draw" so long as I supply the orders, test tubes, etc - which Dr KKs office supplies me with)

5/23 Baseline u/s for FET...if all goes well I start estrace and Augmentin ( a broad-spectrum antibiotic to r/o endometrial infection)

5/28 Begin Lovenox as part of my immune protocol

5/31 Repeat the blood work panel from 5/17

6/3 Fly to Chicago to have my uterine blood flow checked. I am also due for a lining check for my RE so I plan to have them do it there...if all goes well, I'll start progesterone

6/8-6/10 ****crossing my fingers SO DAMN HARD**** that this will be a transfer of 2 blastocysts.


So many thing are different about this cycle, and these differences bring hope. Hope is a scary thing.

Our prior cycles were antagonist with equal parts Menopur and Gonal F. The only difference between them was the fact that we used estrogen priming for IVF #2. Both yielded 7 usable eggs, of which 4 and 3, respectively, fertilized. Both cycles were 3dts - our first IVF we did an eSET, and our second we transferred two.

This cycle has been a total 180...we did MDLF with estrogen priming, we used a lower total dose of stims, we used a small amount of Menopur instead of equal amounts, we added HGH, we found out that I was heterozygous for MTHFR and began treating that with Methylfolate, we visited the RI who put me on levothyroxine for my thyroid, I took prednisone during stims for my cytokines, I began self-treating cytokines with fish oil and chia seeds, we primed my uterine lining with Depot Lupron for 3 monthly injections, we are doing a FET for the first time, and we have blasts!! Something we have never had before...and, finally, I'll be on lovenox for poor uterine bloodflow and prednisone for my cytokines. If that doesn't work, we will use IVIG, which was somehow, some way, approved by my insurance (but will still be $520/infusion until we hit our OOP max).

Whew...did you keep up with all of that?

These changes excite me, but they also scare the shit out of me because nothing will guarantee that it works. I'm at a point where I feel it is impossible to be pregnant, and I am trying so.damn.hard to keep my chin up, pretend the glass is half-full, keep my eyes on the prize, see the silver lining, and all sorts of other cliché things that people say when you want to crawl in a hole and die over how shitty your life is going.

Time will tell, and for once in this whole shitty journey, I'm really hoping that it is finally MY time.



Well, its been a while...Depot Lupron update...

     Hey there. I have been pretty MIA for the last couple of months. I would love to say that it's been because I've been traveling the world, or [insert super fun thing here], but I haven't. I have been working, going to my clinical rotations, teaching and doing homework for class. Boo. Oh yea, I've also been in a menopausal state, so that's been pretty awesome.

My life has basically been like this:

Depot Lupron hasn't been that bad for me...luckily. The list of side effects would make your head spin...blood in your stool, muscle pains, bone pain, etc. I've just been hot flashing like hell. I would say I get about 1 an hour...sometimes more or less...it's like a furnace is lit in my body. My legs and arms heat up at rapid speed...then it reaches my face and I start to sweat. It's sexy, trust me.

The hot flashes and I were getting along swell until they fucked with my sleep. I'm a great sleeper usually. Despite being anxious and anal retentive, I can fall asleep on a dime. Once the hot flashes came to town, it's been a never-ending cycle  of waking up screaming hot...remove blankets...wake up freezing...put blankets back on...wake up because I am screaming hot again, rinse, wash, repeat.

Needless to say, wearing layers has been my friend.

My brave husband administered my last injection. I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, but the needle is 2" long and made for someone that you would see on TLCs "My 600lb Life," So as of last weekend, there are no more Depot Lupron injections in my foreseeable future which is beyond exciting. I'm ready to have some estrogen back in my life!